Spring and My Growing Edge

Welcome to Whole and Holy Integrative Wellness! As of February 1, 2021, Susan and I (Michele) have joined our energies to form not only a therapy practice but a vision for integrative wellness that includes care for the mind, body and spirit. Whole and Holy Integrative Wellness is in its infancy and I’m really glad you are with us as we work to grow this vision! 

Spring and growth go hand in hand, so I think it’s fitting that we are beginning our journey together at this time of year. I used to dislike Spring, it’s true. I am allergic to almost everything outside, so I dreaded it. I went as far as to rank it as my least favorite season of the year. The irony is that being outside with things that are growing is one of my all-time absolute favorite things to do. I love trees, flowers, veggies and fruit, dirt, wind, sun, rain…all of it. I would hibernate until mid-June and then emerge as everything was already in progress, sad that I had missed out on the explosion of energy and vivid expression that produced such amazing and astonishing things. It felt like I was missing out on a critical part of the process and I’ll confess that FOMO (fear of missing out) is real in my world.

As I have gotten older, my perspective on Spring has undergone a subtle change, as I grow in acceptance of my limitations and shift my perspective. I can’t change that I am allergic to some of the things in life that provide me the most joy. I can’t change that I still have to “quarantine” during the high pollen times of May and June. I am learning to accept that I will be mostly a spectator during this time of excitement and emergence. What gradually became clear is the energy of the season, the movement in the seeds and soil, are not bound by space or proximity and I don’t have to be outside to be a part of what is happening. I can give my FOMO a rest! The things I love about the season transcend the physical barriers of my walls and windows and I can enjoy them even when I’m not outside. 

Acceptance of the things I cannot change is a growing edge. Frankly, I hate that I have to do it. Sometimes it makes me really mad and sad and resentful. I get mad at my body, my sinuses, my circumstances…all of it. It’s not rational, but it’s real. My reality. Maybe yours, too. What I’ve found is that my self-talk, what I tell myself about what I’m going through, can make or break the moment. Sometimes it feels like I can’t control what I think. It automatically happens when I bump into a trigger, something that takes me back to an old place of pain. I won’t lie and say it’s easy to change what I tell myself, it’s not. I have to wrestle with it and invite a different and more true thought into the process and then agree with it as I keep working through the situation, conversation, or experience. I agree with the truth that it’s hard to do x,y,z AND then I also agree that I can do hard things, like be inside and watching behind my walls and windows as life energy brings forth beauty. I can also acknowledge another truth, that I am changing and growing, too. We are all changing and growing.

Susan and I are grateful to be with you. Thanks for being a part of our process and growing together with us. I look forward to seeing what comes out of this fertile soil. Connect and grow with us at http://www.facebook.com/wholeandholypa and Instagram @wholeandholy.

Michele